Does a man still have the right to court a woman today without being accused of violence?
Sadly, many men no longer know how to engage in the
wonderful tradition of courtship. Even a friendly or suggestive glance can, in
today’s climate, be misinterpreted as aggression. This reality is rooted in a
broader context: women have historically been, and remain, victims of physical,
emotional, and psychological abuse. Protecting women is essential, and
measures—especially those heightened during Covid-19—have been crucial in
addressing these injustices.
Yet, heightened awareness and legal protections can
sometimes lead to misunderstandings or, occasionally, misuse of the system. In
my experience as a judicial expert, I have observed cases where claims were not
always made in good faith. Thankfully, many judges act with professionalism and
fairness, taking context and evidence into account—but this is not consistent
across all regions of France.
The result today is a certain instability in how men
can express admiration or affection. Compliments that once might have been
received as flattering can now be seen as offensive or even abusive. Social
media platforms like Facebook, TikTok, and other international forums amplify
this problem, exposing men to public criticism and misinterpretation more than ever
before.
External factors further complicate the situation.
Global conflicts, such as the war between Russia and Ukraine or the ongoing
tensions between Israel and Palestine, have created widespread uncertainty and
stress. History shows that societies living under prolonged conflict—from the
World Wars to the Cold War—experience increased social anxiety, mistrust, and
difficulty forming meaningful personal relationships. Stress and insecurity are
powerful disruptors of human connection.
At the same time, popular beliefs about life, success,
and happiness—whether from social media, cultural norms, or historical ideals
of rational self-control—often add pressure rather than relief. Humans have
always sought external validation to define their worth, from the Enlightenment
era to today, and this continues to complicate the pursuit of authentic
relationships.
Many now turn to dating apps to avoid loneliness.
Historically, men bore the financial costs of these platforms, but today women
often share expenses, which seems fair. Yet, meaningful human connection
remains elusive for many. Why?
1. Digital conversation cannot fully replicate
face-to-face interaction.
2. Even single women often struggle to form genuine
connections online.
3. Social and emotional education has not prepared us for
these new ways of meeting people.
Humanity faces a digital inheritance. The next generation
will grow up navigating these complexities, building the future based on the
values and habits passed down to them. Much of today’s misunderstanding and
emotional struggle is the legacy of previous generations.
The pandemic amplified these dynamics, exposing both
societal strengths and weaknesses. Yet, history reminds us of human resilience:
after the 1918 Spanish flu, and following the devastation of the World Wars,
communities rebuilt social bonds, trust, and intimacy. Crises may challenge us,
but they cannot extinguish the human desire for connection.
Despite conflicts, misunderstandings, and evolving
social norms, one thing remains constant: humans seek companionship, emotional
connection, and love. Courtship may have changed, and digital life has
transformed the way we meet and interact, but the fundamental human need to
connect endures.
This is my reflection—a synthesis from years of
observing modern society, the evolving nature of courtship, and the many
historical and contemporary factors that shape human happiness.
SAISI